Kermit & Miss Piggy Are Finally Getting Married (Would You Wait 40 Years?)

Hold up.  Wait.  Stop the press.  It just got real.... 

The adorable, sweet, soft-spoken Kermit the Frog and the one & only, the O.D. (Original Diva), the fearless and always fabulous Miss Piggy are FINALLY getting married! 

After a 40-year courtship, Miss Piggy has apparently snagged her longtime boo.  Word on the street is their wedding will take place in the new movie, "Muppets Most Wanted."  I haven't seen the movie yet, so I can't confirm it.  The gossip folks say Miss Piggy reached out to Vivienne Westwood recently and asked the designer to create a wedding gown for her.  Hmmm.... Sounds like somebody's walking down the aisle to me!

Listen.  If it IS true, I'll be the first to congratulate them.  Because duh, I love love!   

But, if I can be honest for a sec....  *sips tea*  I love Miss Piggy and all, but I don't know if I would have waited 40 years to marry the love of my life.  I mean, the first thought that comes to my mind is,'What took so damn long?'  But hey, I'm a Virgo and I'm impatient, so there's that.  

I understand people wanting to make sure they're ready for marriage.  But, 40 years?  Geez.  

In reality, there's no blueprint that outlines the appropriate time to date someone before you become engaged and then enter into a marriage.  There's no right or wrong answer.  It's a personal decision based on a lot of factors.  I get it.

Miss Piggy and Kermit's love clearly has no expiration date.  But, let's be real.  They're muppets.  They could have waited another 20 years and no big deal!    

But, would you wait 40 years for love?  Would you wait 3 months? Two years?  Indefinitely?  

Love is amazing, weird and beautiful.  It's one hell of a drug.  And yes, it will make you do some crazy things.  #neversaynever

THIS is Girl Power!

Printing this on 5,000 t-shirts:



The wink at the end though....  #priceless

Best. Christmas. Card. Ever!

So yeah...I feel like a failure in life.  My Christmas cards are NOTHING like this.  *kicks rocks*  :-)

10 Things Santa Will Do After Christmas

1. Triple check his list to make sure everyone received their gifts.
   
   
2. Check Instagram to see all of the beautiful #MerryChristmas pictures.
   
   
3. Get a massage.  After visiting 842 million homes and traveling 221 million miles to reach each kid, "exhausted" is an understatement.
   
   
4. Date night with the Mrs.  He's been working long hours and she's been patient.  It's "her" time now.
   
   
5. Hit the gym.  A diet that consists mostly of milk and cookies can wreak havoc on a waistline.
   
   
6. Stop by the barber shop.  Make sure his beard is still tight.
   
   
7. Sign and distribute elf bonus checks.  They're the forgotten heroes in all of this.
   
   
8. Take the sleigh in for a tune-up.
   
   
9. Call his publicist - Officially decline FOX News' invite to come on and talk about fictional characters and their racial backgrounds.
   
   
10. Download the new Beyonce album.  #fan

A Letter To God...From The Thanksgiving Turkey

This is totally something I would do.  I'd probably also include a PowerPoint presentation with the letter to further explain my position.  LOL!   #Virgo 

Happy Thanksgiving!

(BEST) Dog Halloween Costumes Of 2013 (LOL!)

Dogs make me smile.  Dogs in Halloween costumes make me laugh.  Loudly.  :-)  Here are my favorite pics for Halloween 2013: 

Double Trouble :)

Itty Bitty Bumble Bee

No costume needed.  #Fierce

Where's Waldo???

Star Wars Fans

Divalicious!

Family Portrait

No Caption Needed...

Taste the rainbow :)

Scary...Really

GQ

Vine Video Of The Week (The Doggy Paddle)

I don't know about you, but I feel like this sometimes: 

LOL!!!!!

Unwritten Twitter Rules - What They Don't Tell You When You Sign Up (Vol. IV)

This is my fourth installment of Unwritten Twitter Rules!  Tremendous milestone, I know. :)  In case you missed Volumes 1-3, here you go:

Volume I: http://dld.bz/cwwD2

Volume II: http://dld.bz/c52tT

Volume III: http://dld.bz/cHySq 

You're welcome.   And now for your reading pleasure....Unwritten Twitter Rules - Volume IV: 

• Never let your momma know your Twitter handle.  NEVER.  :-)
  
  
• If someone retweets you five times a day, ya'll go together.  #TwitterBoo
  
  
• A tweet that takes two tweets to express is usually wack. (I do it all the time though - Lol!)
  
  
• People who live to bully folks on Twitter always have some type of real life issue(s). Pray for 'em.
• It's hard to believe, but people embellish A LOT on Twitter. *side-eye*  Always remember that they're just people...sitting behind a computer.
  
  
• Being a black person who tweets vs. Being a part of "Black Twitter." *sigh* (There's a difference.)
• The same people who create drama on Twitter do so in real life also.  #Fact
  
  
• Just because you have a Twitter account doesn't mean you have to comment on EVERYTHING.  Feel free shut-up on some topics.
  
  
• Twitter Beefs - People fight allllll the time on Twitter.  It's best to stay out of it because more than likely there's way more to the story than 140 characters.

Vine Video Of The Week (Addicted to McDonald's)

My Winning Powerball Music Playlist

Can you imagine winning $400 million dollars???  I can!   Listen.  If I win the Powerball Jackpot this week....  No--wait. What am I saying?  Scratch that.  *positive thinking*  WHEN I win the lottery (Come on Jesus), I'm gonna celebrate! I'm celebrating with lots and lots of music to commemorate the moment.  In fact, I'm hiring my own personal DJ to follow me around and bless me with great sounds. 

I've actually created my music playlist (with strict instructions) for the big pay day.  Wanna see it, here it goes!   *dancing*

For The Love Of Money (Money, Money, Money) - The O'Jays (I'll start my 1st day as a multimillionairess listening to this song.)

Look Like Money - Yung Ralph (Play this as they're presenting me with my check on TV.  Don't listen to what my momma says - Just play it!)

It's All About The Benjamins - Puffy (All day rotation)

Shower The People - James Taylor (Play this as I'm meeting with my new lawyers to discuss details...Gotta take care of my fam!)

Party Up In Here (Ya'll gone make me lose my mind - up in here!) - DMX (All day rotation)

Before I Let Go (Extended remix version) - Frankie Beverly and Maze (This should play as I'm walking in to my "I won the lottery" celebration party.)

That's What Friends Are For - Dionne Warwick, Stevie Wonder, Elton John, Gladys Knight (My friends will cry when this plays at my party 'cuz I'll be presenting them with dolla dolla bills, ya'll!) 

Let's Get Crazy - Prince (All day rotation)

Tie Tuesday (Arsenio Hall)

He's baaaaaaaaaccckkkk!  After a 19-year hiatus, Arsenio Hall stepped back on the scene last week with his new late night syndicated talk show.  

Calling it his "Back Is Beautiful" campaign, Arsenio hasn't missed a beat!  He's still engaging, silly, comfortable and extremely relatable on camera.  In its first week back, The Arsenio Hall Show featured several A-List guests including Magic Johnson, Angela Bassett, Lisa Kudrow, Chris Tucker, Mark Harmon and Ice Cube. 

A LOT of people have TV talk shows.  Some of them are good, but most of them aren't.  And none of them are "Arsenio Hall."  He's really one of a kind.  His does things his way.  And even almost 20 years later....it works. 

Vine Video Of The Week (If This Dog Isn't A Virgo...)

If this dog isn't a Virgo, I don't know who is!  I give folks this "look" at least 2-3 times a week. LOL! 

Vine Video Of The Week: Summer Is NOT Over!

This is TOTALLY something I would do! :)   #VineSummer

Vine Video Of The Week - "I Said YMCA!"

Instructions: Unmute (top left corner) and laugh. You're welcome. :-)

Unwritten Twitter Rules - What They Don't Tell You When You Sign Up (Vol III)

This is my third installment of "Unwritten Twitter Rules."  Click here to read Volume I.  And here for Volume II.  You know above all, I'm here for the people so please let me know if I've missed anything.  :-)  

Sweet Dreams Twitterville - You don't have to tell Twitter goodnight...you can just shut up.  (Ditto for Facebook.)

Following Folks - Following people only because they agree with you is sooooo boring.  Mix it up.  Take me for example.  I follow Sarah Palin.  Not because I agree with her thoughts.  NOPE.  But, I do think she's funny.  BOY is she funny!   

Sarcasm - If you're sarcastic like me, you gotta be careful.  A lot of folks are too sensitive for Twitter.  The issue is...sarcasm gets retweeted and subsequently offends someone who's cat just died or something.  *sigh*

Twitter Beefs - It's pointless getting into arguments with people on Twitter. Too much flawed logic to even know where to start.

The Infamous Subtweet ("Subliminal Tweet") - Listen.  If you think everyone is subtweeting about you, you got issues - real talk.  And Twitter will only make them worse.  So, stop tweeting and get some help. (Sounds like a public service announcement, right?)  :-)

Twitter Friends - Twitter is a great place to meet interesting, fun people who share common interests, BUT....it's NOT healthy to only have Twitter friends.  Go forth & find real-life friends whose personalities don't originate in a 140-character field, K?

Your Twitter Civic Duty - Careful.  Before you jump on the civic duty bandwagon...hold up.  Twitter is THE place for short lived civil campaigns.  Remember the huge KONY campaign of 2012?  No?  My point exactly!  

Calm Down, Breathe...It's Just Twitter - If EVERYTHING someone says on Twitter makes you hop on the defensive and go off on a tirade, then maybe--just maybe....you should just stay off of Twitter.

Warning - Here's What Happens When You Give Vine To Kids (LOL!)

If you're still not a fan of Vine, this JUST might change your mind.  I've watched this six-second video about 500 times. Heeeelarious! 

This is what your kids are doing when you're at work: https://vine.co/v/bYnKOiPT2nV 

BEST Dog Halloween Costumes of 2012 (LOL!)

Know what I love?  Dogs.  Know what I love even more?  Dogs in costumes!  *giggle*


Harry Potter is in the building!



Granny and Little Red Riding Hood  *giggle*  :)

They look....scared. :)

Jedi.  Enough said.



I Dream of Jeannie!  LOL!

"We're definitely not in Kansas anymore." - Lion, Dorothy & Scarecrow



Lola, the Grouch :)

Boooooooooooooo!!!