Tie Tuesday (Jason Collins)

I'm toooooootalllly loving NBA player Jason Collins right now.  He did something so remarkably brave yesterday. His unwavering courage makes my heart smile.  I don't know him, but I sure wish I did.  He's best known for his basketball skills, but his legacy will be the news he recently shared with Sports Illustrated: 

                                         "I'm a 34-year old NBA center.  I'm black.  And I'm gay."

So, here he is.  The first openly gay athlete playing in a major American team sport.  Wow.  I mean...wow!   

After I read Jason's story, I was reminded of how important it is to live a life that's genuine and true.  It takes so much courage to live your life as YOU see fit.  It shouldn't be that way though.  It really shouldn't.  We should be able to live and think as freely as we wish.  In doing so, maybe we can help others along the way.  I know Jason's announcement will help others.  It will help some people embrace who they are and it will also help our country to become more compassionate.  

I'm convinced that being who you are and living in that truth is the path to happiness. Trusting yourself and making choices without fear is just...dope.  Point blank period.  Sound simple?  Not always.  But, it's sooooo worth it.      

Click here to read Jason's Sports Illustrated article. 

I'm Black & Blonde -- Deal With It

The title of the article read:  "The Implications & Ramifications of Being Black and Blonde."  I re-read it to make sure I wasn't being punk'd.  I read it out loud--just to make surrrre.  Yep--that's what it said, alright.

Here's an excerpt from the piece:

"African-American women should release the hold that blonde hair has had on us.  It's not a natural hair color.  It's not really a good look if you're over 30.  It's not particularly healthy for your hair."

I don't know where to begin with this one.  Release the "hold" on blonde hair?  Not a "natural" hair color?  Not a good look if you're over  *clears my throat*  30???  

Huh?  Woo Jesus.  I had to ask Him to hold my mule, my wig and all of my calls.

Me...as a blonde

So, I'm Black and blonde.  My natural hair color is a dark brown, but I've been an on-and-off again blonde for many years.  I enjoy it.  It fits me - right now, and it's fun.  Honestly, I didn't put a lot of thought into lightening my locks.  I didn't pray about it.  Didn't seek counseling.  I didn't look at a beautiful blue-eyed blonde woman and think, "Man, I wanna look like...her."  Nope.  None of that.  I was bored with my hair one day and the next day - *voilà*, I was a blonde!    

In full disclosure, let me point out that my hair has been every color on the market.  EVERY color, do you hear me?  Why? I get bored quickly and I like to try new things--in all areas of my life.  And as a Black woman, I don't put limitations on my life.  The world already puts us in these weird, inaccurate, silly boxes:

"Black women don't work-out."

"Black women aren't very approachable. They
 communicate differently."

"Black women can't/don't do.....THAT."   

And now, you're telling us we shouldn't rock blonde hair?  Blonde hair is reserved for certain types of "women" only?  Puh-lease.  Dumbest thing I've heard in a long time. Whew--where do people come up with this stuff??

The lesson here is this:  Make sure your self-esteem is in tact.  Especially if you're a Black woman.  I'm no Dr. Phil, but I have common sense.  These kinds of dysfunctional words/messages are designed to make women question their self-worth.  And listen.  It happens. Sometimes we lose sight of our worth.  But, we have to grab it back and hold on tight.

Learn to be comfortable with who you are (blonde, brunette or braids) and commit to living freely in that truth--no matter what others say/think about you.  Know who you are.  Know it.  Own it.  Embrace it.   *pause & repeat*   Know it.  Own it.  Embrace it.   *pause & repeat*   Know it. Own it.  Embrace it.  (Get the picture?)