When Reality TV Chickens Come Home to Roost... (The Porsha/Kenya Fight)

Over the past few days, everyone has been up in arms about the recent cat fight between Porsha Williams and Kenya Moore.  Two beautiful women.  Grown women.  Cast members (I refuse to call them stars) on the popular reality TV show Real Housewives of Atlanta.  Well, technically it wasn't really a fight.  One woman physically assaulted the other one because she (and other cast members) felt like she was being provoked.

*sigh* 

Let me just say this... I don't condone or support violence.  AT ALL.  And I will never come to someone's defense who physically attacks another person if it isn't self-defense. I totally understand feeling provoked though. I get it. I've been there - many times.  But I watched the reunion show and my question is this: Weren't they all being provoked??? 

Those beautiful women sat there in their designer gowns, flawless makeup and spewed out demeaning comments at one another all night.  They called each other slut...hoe....b*tch...repeatedly. Talk about being provoked!  I personally know some women who will get it poppin' it you call them ANY of those names.  Sure, one of the cast members had some props with her antics, which was annoying, inappropriate, and childish.  But I blame Bravo TV for allowing that.  They write the checks and they make the rules. #fact

I blame both women also. You can't bully someone with verbal abuse, props and/or accusations and get physical when you (Porsha) feel provoked.  It doesn't work that way.  If it did, we'd all have arrest records with multiple charges of battery. You also can't add fuel to the fire (Kenya) and then act surprised when it blows all the way up!

I don't watch Real Housewives of Atlanta regularly. God bless you if you do.  But from what I've seen, most of these ladies' conflict could be avoided if they would do one simple thing: Grow up.  

Say No to Yes People.....

You can totally tell when a celebrity has a team of "yes" people working for/with them.  I'm not calling anybody out, but you've seen these celebs go bat crazy in media interviews, right?  You've watched their performances at awards shows and thought..."What the !$@% was that?!"  And you've raised an eyebrow at some of their questionable career choices.  

It's natural to want people around you who are supportive and positive.  I get that.  Trust me, I get it!  However--and this is a big however, if your squad consists of a bunch of "yes" people, be careful.  "Yes" people will try to convince you that average is good enough. They'll have you believing that mediocrity is the norm.  They're uncomfortable with telling you the truth.  "Yes" people will have you out here looking...foolish. 

Having supportive and positive folks in your circle is a must!  Make sure you have genuine people who have your best interest at heart also.  People who will tell you the brutal, honest truth when everyone else is stroking your ego.  People who aren't afraid to tell you flat out, "Dude, you're f***king up."  People who will look you square in your eyes and say, "I disagree with you and here's why...."

I recently finished a major project and shared it with a close friend/mentor for feedback. This friend is wickedly talented and very successful.  I respect his opinion and I know he cares about me.  After reviewing my work, he gave it a 7.5 out of 10.  Ugh!  My heart sank.  It was tough to hear, but you know what?  He was right.  

I carefully reviewed his feedback, examined my work and made some adjustments.  And now?  My project is much better and scheduled to launch this summer (Yes!).   

Anywho...the moral of the story is this: Be cautious of folks who only tell you what you want to hear ("Yes" people).  Be open to constructive criticism.  Be 'OK' with being wrong sometimes and make changes if necessary.  And always surround yourself with people who will push you to be your best.  

Pic of The Week (The Color Pink!)

Look at singer Kelis in all of this pink fabulousness.  I give this an overwhelming...YEEESSS! 

Social Media 101: Beware Of Twitter Bullies

I'm a news junkie, so I love Twitter.  It gives me a variety of up-to-date information at lightening speeds.  I get tidbits of national news, local politics, business tips and pop culture in a matter of seconds.  If you're in PR and you're not using Twitter as a resource?  *side eye* 

Anywho... I enjoy Twitter.  But like everything, it's not perfect.  Case in point: A lot of people use Twitter to bully, degrade and harass folks.  They sit behind their computer (lurking, I imagine), spewing out mean and hateful comments whenever they want.  Twitter bullies.  *sigh*  Unfortunately, most them do this on a daily basis.  And what's more troubling is, a lot of Twitter bullies have a large number of followers, which essentially fuels their twisted egos.   

They think it's cool to make fun of celebrities, laugh at children's shortcomings and tell people they're ugly, fat and unwanted.  I personally don't know what's going on with your spirit that allows you to put someone else down on a regular basis.  You've got to be a sad bucket of broken dreams to do that, and enjoy it.  

In 2012, a study showed that there were 15,000 bully-related tweets posted every day. That's more than 100,000 tweets that pollute Twitter each week.  Terrible.  But there are things we can do to stop this Twitter bully nonsense: 

• Don't engage with them or acknowledge them (Ignore them)
  
  
• Block them (Prevents a person from following you or seeing your timeline)
  
  
• Reporter them to Twitter (Twitter has a strict policy about bullying, abuse & harassment)

Most important, always focus on the positive.  Twitter is not a bad thing.  Don't let others ruin it for you. 

Olivia Pope Quotes That Will Make You Smile, Blush & Giggle

Scandal premieres tonight and like millions of other viewers, I'll be sitting at home at 10:00 pm (EST) glued to ABC.  I'll have my favorite glass of Riesling, and my phone will be close by for hilarious text commentary with friends during the commercial breaks.  Great times, man.  Great times. :)

What can I say, I love Scandal!  And I love the character, Olivia Pope.  Key word: character.  I know she's not real, but Shonda Rhimes and Kerry Washington have given her life.  Olivia is a smart, scandalous, unethical woman who is impeccably dressed with stilettos on deck with every outfit.  She's known for a lot of things (LOTS), especially her unforgettable quotes:   

"I don't want normal and easy and simple. I want painful, difficult, devastating, life-changing, extraordinary love."

"I'm going to need you to refrain from calling me a whore...at least not in front of my face."

"I'm many things, stupid is not one of them."

"Going up against the white house is the biggest thing we've ever done. It will be hard. It will be mean. It will be personal." 

"Normal is overrated."

"I always have cards left to play." 

"Give me your tie.  Take it off.  Off, off, off, off." 

"It's handled."

#Scandal

These Two... Ossie & Ruby (Happy Valentine's Day)

I've always loved these two....

Ossie Davis and Ruby Dee.  Their love, talent, chemistry and commitment to their community and each other remains unparalleled.  When I think about love & relationships, they always come to mind.  

Their union lasted 56 years (Ossie died in 2005).  Can you imagine loving someone...sharing this journey of life with your soul mate for almost 60 years?  On their time together, Miss Ruby has said, "That we arrived at fifty years together is due as much to luck as to love, and a talent for knowing, when we stumble, where to fall, and how to get up again."

Thinking about them today... 

#HappyValentinesDay

Public Service Announcement: If You Think I'm Writing About You, I Am

I'm a writer (duh), so I get inspiration from everything - EVERYTHING.  I watch people.  I listen.  I pay attention to details (I'm a Virgo too), and I read anything I can get my hands on.  Those things fuel my imagination.  They ignite my energy to create.  Did I mention....I'm a writer. 

If you're my friend, an associate and or even a stranger I've passed on the street, please know that I'll write about you. I will and I do!  Now, I'll never abuse your personal trust.  No way would I ever do that. I won't share your name or any personal, irrelevant details.  But I'll write about something you said or how you made me feel.  I'll write about a situation or a conversation.  In fact, conversations with family and friends have inspired some of my favorite posts. 

So yeah.  If you think I'm writing about you...I totally am.  

You're Being Interviewed By The Media? Here's What NOT To Do!

Take a look at this interview with former reality star Kate Gosselin and her twin daughters.  Brace yourself.  It's brutal.



Awkward, right?  My guess is that Ms. Gosselin's publicist prepped her and her girls for this interview.  But when the cameras started rolling...something happened.  The kids became nervous (understandable).  Emotions took over (common mistake).  And the interview took a left turn with the reporter's questions (it happens). 

Know this: Great interviews don't just randomly happen.  No. No. No.  Preparation is key!  

Tips:

• As an interviewee, you have to know what you want to accomplish in the interview.  Ask yourself - What is my goal here?
  
  
• Decide what it is you want to say.  Create 3-4 key messages and stick to them.
  
  
• During your interview, stay focused and confident.  Remember, you're there to accomplish your goal!
  
  
• If you're asked a question and you don't know the answer, say so.

Being interviewed by the media can be extremely intimidating.  Without the right preparation, you could end up making a fool of yourself.  No one wants that, right?  Right!

Pic Of The Week (Girl Power)

The Golden Globes aired last night.  Actress Lupita Nyong'o (12 Years a Slave) shut it down in a gorgeous Ralph Lauren ensemble.  Talk about Girl Power!  Whew.  Gah.  Gorgeous.

Happy Birthday Zora!

If you want me to turn into a chatter box, ask me about The Harlem Renaissance.  I looooooove this period of time in history.  LOVE.  

The Harlem Renaissance was a cultural movement in the 1920's.  It was a creative awakening when African Americans fully embraced literary, musical, theatrical and visual arts.  The movement originated in the Harlem section of New York, but wasn't confined to that area.  Its impact grew and created a huge impact on the consciousness of the world.
  
Zora Neale Hurston was one of The Harlem Renaissance's most popular artists.  An amazing storyteller, her writings were bold and honest.  She was fearless and made no apologies for living her life exactly how she wanted.  If you really want to experience her greatness, read Their Eyes Were Watching God.  Zora wrote it in 1937, after the ending of a love affair she had with a younger man.  A beautiful piece of work.  A masterpiece.

Today is Zora's birthday (she passed away in 1960).  I wish I had an opportunity to meet her.  I think we would have liked each other.  We're both from Florida.  Writing is our first love.  We both have a wicked sense of humor. Soooo much in common!  Yeah, we would have definitely hit it off.  The best way I can honor her now is to try & live my life the way her writings read: Vivid, spirit-filled, fearless and love embodied.  

The universe gave birth to a gift named Zora.  For that, we should all collectively give a heartfelt...thank you. 

Mandela: A Long Walk to Freedom - An Inspiring Tribute

Nelson Mandela lived 95 long years.  Amazing.  He blessed us in so many courageous ways.  When I sit and think--really think about his vision, his sacrifices, his strength and his unwavering commitment to humanity, it leaves me speechless.  And after seeing the movie, Mandela: A Long Walk to Freedom, all I could do was shake my head in disbelief. This really happened.  

The story of Nelson Mandela.... Whew.  A few months ago, I said to a friend, "How in the world does someone tell THAT story?"  So many layers. Decades of history.  Political control.  Cultural relevance. Apartheid.  Legacy.  Pain and heartache.  What an undertaking!    

William Nicholson's (the film's screenwriter) and Justin Chadwick's (director) interpretation of Nelson Mandela's life is uncomplicated and moving.  This film is the reason why movies should be made: To tell stories that entertain, agitate, educate and make you think.  I'm still thinking about this movie...    

Idris Elba as Mandela.  My goodness.  His portrayal is so captivating that it demands your undivided attention.  The movie begins with Mandela in his 20's.  He transforms from a charming ladies man to a husband and father, who eventually makes mistakes.  Mandela's anger over a friend's death ignites his fire to fight for equality.  That commitment changes his life, everyone who loves him and the future of a country.  Idris physically changes throughout the movie to age 75, but his presence remains strong and dignified until the end.  A commanding performance. An award worthy performance. 

The movie also depicts Winnie Mandela's struggle. Mandela loves his Winnie.  And she loves him, but more poignantly, she believes in him and his vision.  She continues to fight with him, for him and the people of South Africa for 27 years.  Her spirit is fiery and her strength is undeniable, but when she and Nelson touch each other for the first time in 21 years, she is simply....a woman in love.  It is the most heart-rending scene in the movie. Naomie Harris (who played Winnie Mandela) showed up, rolled up her sleeves and gave this role her everything.  Beyond impressive.
   

Idis Elba and Naomie Harris as Nelson and Winnie Mandela.

I grew up knowing Nelson Mandela was a hero of our times.  After seeing the film, I still believe he is.  But now, I realize he was a man with a fearless drive to do the right thing. He was a man who was passionate about humanity and forgiveness. A man who taught the world so many valuable lessons.  An example of love.  A champion of the people.  A great man.  

My Theme Song For 2014....

Being happy is a choice worth making.  Try it.  *sips tea*  Want some?  It's delicious. :)

Best. Christmas. Card. Ever!

So yeah...I feel like a failure in life.  My Christmas cards are NOTHING like this.  *kicks rocks*  :-)

10 Things Santa Will Do After Christmas

1. Triple check his list to make sure everyone received their gifts.
   
   
2. Check Instagram to see all of the beautiful #MerryChristmas pictures.
   
   
3. Get a massage.  After visiting 842 million homes and traveling 221 million miles to reach each kid, "exhausted" is an understatement.
   
   
4. Date night with the Mrs.  He's been working long hours and she's been patient.  It's "her" time now.
   
   
5. Hit the gym.  A diet that consists mostly of milk and cookies can wreak havoc on a waistline.
   
   
6. Stop by the barber shop.  Make sure his beard is still tight.
   
   
7. Sign and distribute elf bonus checks.  They're the forgotten heroes in all of this.
   
   
8. Take the sleigh in for a tune-up.
   
   
9. Call his publicist - Officially decline FOX News' invite to come on and talk about fictional characters and their racial backgrounds.
   
   
10. Download the new Beyonce album.  #fan

Christmas Came A Little Early, No? (Thanks Beyonce)

Sooooo, Christmas came a little early!  I went to sleep last night and woke up to: 

Beyonce dropped a *gulp* 14-track video album on iTunes around midnight last night. Yep--each song comes with its very own video. *gulp again*  Listen.  Even if you don't like Beyonce (What the !@$& is wrong with you?), you gotta respect her brand: Bold and freakin' fearless. 

No marketing.  No promotion.  No warning.  Nada.  Just greatness.  Well played, B.  Well played.  #VirgoNation

 

Tie Tuesday (Paul Walker)

My mouth literally fell open when I heard the news about Paul Walker. What?  No.  Really?!?!  I mean, really??  It was an Internet hoax.  It HAD to be.  Unfortunately, it wasn't. 

Paul Walker.  I mean, this guy is a movie star who's known for driving fast cars in his films. And...he's killed in a car accident?  Still hard to believe.  

And for those who can't quite understand why so many people were distraught about Paul's death, here's why:   

He was an embedded fixture in pop culture.  And not just as a pretty face.  Yes, he was freakishly handsome.  Like, take-your-breath-away good looking, but that's not it.  Paul was a part of one of the most successful movie franchises ever, Fast & Furious (Universal Studio's biggest franchise of all time.) 

The multiethnic cast, gorgeous stars, family elements and consistent storytelling has worked for Fast & Furious.  The movies have grossed almost $3 billion worldwide, and continue to dominate the international film market also.  

So, Paul Walker was a world famous super star.  Huge.  And his impact on our culture was undeniably real.  He passed away a few days ago and people are still talking about it.  Still in shock.  His influence and impact won't go away because he died. We'll keep talking about him.  We'll keep swooning over those piercing blue eyes.  We'll keep watching his movies. We'll always remember him.  Watch and see.    

 

 

Tie Tuesday (Shuggie Otis)

I loooooove music!  All kinds.  My personal catalog includes everybody from James Taylor to Tupac Shakur.  I'm attracted to artists who aren't afraid to step out of the box and be true to themselves. 

That's Shuggie Otis.  He's a serious, accomplished musician first.  An incredible guitarist.  I respect that.  And although his music is clearly influenced by jazz, R&B and blues, his psychedelic & eclectic style always shines through. 

Over the years, Shuggie has worked with Etta James, B.B. King and Jackie Wilson just to name a few.  He scored his biggest hit with "Strawberry Letter 23."  And then he just kinda disappeared - for almost 40 years.  Earlier this year, he released new music with his "Wings of Love" album. Yes!   

Throughout the music industry, Shuggie has been sampled by Beyonce, Outkast, DJ Quick and many others.   

When asked about Shuggie Otis recently, Lenny Kravtiz (another one of my favorites) said, "He's a great example of an artist that erases the borders between genres.  His sweet voice paints intoxicating pictures full of vivid imagery."

I couldn't have said it any better.... 

   

Who's Ready For Christmas? (Pic Of The Day)

These two guys are ready!  LOL! 

Tie Tuesday (Andy Warhol)

I love people who are talented, unique and...bold.  People like pop artist and cultural icon, Andy Warhol.  He's one of my favorites!  It's been over 20 years since his death and we're still talking about him and his work. If that's not the definition of longevity, I don't know what is!

His art wasn't subtle or shy.  It grabbed your attention and wouldn't let go until you acknowledged it.  His signature brand was the fusion of his personal style and artwork.  He was a creative thinker who always seemed to be ahead of his time artistically.  Super smart dude.

In addition to being an artist, Andy was also a filmmaker.  He made nearly 60 movies during his lifetime.  And he didn't stop there.  He published magazines and several books too.  A real artist. 

Some of his work: 

 

10 Reasons Why a 'Roots' Remake Is a Bad Idea

Brace yourself.  *long sigh*  History (The History Channel) just announced plans to remake....Roots.  Yes, Roots.  One of the most celebrated and groundbreaking TV programs of all time.  And no, I'm not kidding.  Roots - the miniseries that debuted in 1977 and earned a record 36 Emmy nominations, winning nine, including best limited series.  

A remake?  Nice.  And by nice, I mean no.  Here are 10 reasons why a Roots remake is a bad idea:

1. Just because Django, The Help, The Butler and 12 Years a Slave did great at the box office doesn't mean the remake of Roots will do the same.
    
2. Hollywood has a terrible track record when it comes to remakes.  The odds aren't good.
   
   
3. Black people have other stories to tell.  Wake up Hollywood!
   
   
4. Greatness (Roots) stands the test of time.  It is what it is. (Air the original).
   
   
5. Twitter will completely shut DOWN if this remake really happens.  Explode!
   
   
6. Roots is a classic.  You see anybody remaking Gone With The Wind?
   
   
7. This remake is a perfect example of doing too much.  And doing too much always backfires. 
   
   
8. A remake seems so lazy.  Create new content! (TV writers have completely run out of new ideas.)
   
   
9. Prettttty sure America has capped off on remakes for the decade. (In other words...folks are sick and tired of remakes.)
   
   
10. The History Channel can't give 10 reasons (good ones) why a remake of Roots is necessary.